Dating Stood Up! |
21.04.06 |
Your online buddy has asked you to meet up. All you’ve ever seen is a picture that you’re not quite sure is his true image. He seems really interesting and witty online. What if he turns out to be totally different in person?
You take the risk. You get all dressed up; go the restaurant where you agreed to meet and sit, nursing a drink. After an hour, you have to face it. You’ve been stood up!
This can be a really painful blow to the ego. He seemed so nice, what in the world could have happened? Did he change his mind? Did he even bother to arrive? Did he change his mind about meeting you when he saw you sitting there? So many questions that only your online buddy can answer.
Here’s one that you should now ask yourself: what next? If the only expectation you had was to meet up with a friend then you would easily say yes to this question. If on the other hand you felt it was a blossoming relationship, you may want to stop and think about a few things. If this was the first time it happened with this person, you can chalk it down to maybe an emergency taking place. This you can find out by asking your date later on.
On the other hand, if it’s happened more than once, please move on to the next guy. If someone is really interested, they won’t leave you hanging like that. At the least if they were truly your friend, they would let you know ahead of time that they’re canceling so that you wouldn’t be embarrassed, sitting in the restaurant and waiting.
Take A Hint! |
20.04.06 |
Men can be wonderful creatures. They can be sweet and thoughtful and genuinely caring. They can also be such pains-in-the rear-end; especially when they insist on playing deaf when you say the word NO!
Now folks, persistence is one thing. It has allowed men like Colonel Sanders and Walt Disney to achieve what others stated was impossible. However there is a major difference between being persistent and being a pest.
Maybe you have the mistaken notion that yes means yes, no means yes and maybe also means yes. The sooner you face up to the reality that women actually mean it when they say no, the easier it will be for you. The only answer of women that means yes is…wait for it….the word YES!
Women have been known to date guys they aren’t really interested in as a future partner. They know that you aren’t their match but they see you as a nice companion and enjoy your company anyway. Refusal to listen to when she says she isn’t interested will move you out of the “nice companion” category to the “to be avoided” group.
You may believe that you are being a gallant white knight and showing her how much you care for her. What she may be seeing is someone who can’t take a hint! If you truly love her, be a friend. She will appreciate you more. Be content with having a good relationship with her even if it isn’t a romantic one.
Now, if she’s forced to use the dreaded, “Can we talk?” speech on you and you still persist, on your head be it. Don’t be surprised to have her hiding from you and rejecting your calls. Don’t wait for her to have to be rude to you - she really doesn’t want to do that.
Just a suggestion: go out with more people. Don’t let yourself fixate - obsession really isn’t healthy. You may not find your match as soon as you’d like but if you keep your eyes open, you’ll find her sooner than later.
What Can I Do to make You Notice Me? |
19.04.06 |
You’ve met the girl of your dreams. She’s absolutely beautiful, drop dead gorgeous, in fact. She is smart and witty and kind. She’s sexy and funny and….in short, she seems absolutely perfect! The only problem is, like the girl from Ipanema, she just doesn’t see you sighing after her.
If you’re really serious about this girl, you need to take stock of your assets and figure out what you have that will attract her attention. For example, if you always see her in the dance clubs you go to, why not ask her to take a spin on the floor. You can show her how well you move on the floor and help her get in the groove.
Why not work on improving yourself while you’re at it. If she’s one who is a fashion plate, then you may want to learn to dress well. You don’t need to buy expensive suits, but do go for colors and cuts that will flatter your body. If you’re not sure how to go about it, you can get some great tips just from watching “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy”.
Women look for more in the men they date than just looks. They’ll check if you have substance as well. Why not hone your conversation skills by reading a book or two. Read the paper and know what’s happening in your community and what’s showing in the movies. This way, if she gives you a clue of what activity she likes, you can jump in with a suggestion of where you can take her to enjoy that event. Don’t be shy about asking her for a date!
Most importantly, pay attention to her. Be genuinely interested in her and what she’s talking about. Listen to what she says and try to find common ground between you. You’re more likely to build a relationship with her if she sees as you as a kindred soul rather than a ship passing in the night.
